The world has no compassion for my poor nerves

[chocolatepot]

I just noticed the back door wasn't fully locked and now I'm freaking out. I mean, if someone was going to have broken in they would have taken something like, IDK, this laptop and clearly it's here so probably nobody came in, also we live at the end of a small subdivision and the ~trouble-making~ element among the teenage population has grown up and moved out, so there probably wasn't even anyone around to notice that it was half-unlocked, but - did I leave it like that? When was the last time I touched that door? What if someone came in and locked it behind them but failed because they weren't paying attention, and now they're hiding in the house? And they just didn't come out for the past three hours because of Reasons?

I've been having anxiety dreams lately that I told Dad weren't anxiety dreams, but after I thought about it for a bit I realized that they all revolve around me having to lock doors so people can't get in, or my car door not being locked. Also, Teddy tends to be there. I suspect this is all about how many nights I'm alone here, because Dad spends most of his time at Melissa's. We need to get another dog so I have a friend. Also I need to lock my bedroom door tonight for the sake of my own nerves.

ETA: I heard a noise. But I don't know what it is. I need to improvise a weapon to take upstairs with me.

Comments

[nostalgia]

knives

[chocolatepot]

I actually thought about it (because we have nothing else, since we're not really into sports) but then I thought about how you're not supposed to carry a weapon you can't use and I decided I wasn't going to be able to stab someone if it came down to it and they could just take the knife away and stab me. So I just walked around with my phone ready to call 911 if I had to. Or something.

[lliira]

I was like that too when I lived alone. Having a cat who was sensitive to noises and who would have attacked anyone she thought was hurting me helped. Getting a dog is a really good idea, I think.

[chocolatepot]

The only trouble with getting a dog is that it's mainly just me here, and I work far enough away that I can't come home at lunch. :/ I don't think that would be fair to a puppy ... maybe I'll ask Melissa if I can borrow her dog, he's a little weird and catlike but he's still a dog.